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Well I did the unthinkable. Yes, I made the conscious and firm decision to cut all ties with hector. See, I spoke with a few psychics and they said that my love/friendship with him has run its course. They said that he is comfortable being friends with benefits and he does love me as much as he is capable of. It hurt to hear that but I have to move on if I want real love to come into my life. Now 2 psychics I spoke with said that love is coming and a man will be entering my life. One psychic said it was a storybook romance. Which is nice. I hope so. Because, i'm a dieheart romantic and I'm single and ready to mingle. Anyways, im still hurt and i actually cry when I think about letting him go. I really loved him and thought he loved me. I don't want to let that life go. But oh well! I gotta get him out of my system so that I can move on. I made the conscious decision also to dedicate myself to my spiritual path. To better myself mentally, emotionally and spiritually. I want to be able to free myself from bondage. What bondage? like on my profile bondage from this world. So until then, we'll see what happens.

Hey everyone,

miss you guys sitting here at hector's house, bored as hell. Watching youtube videos. I need to let hector go. Seems like i'm in willful agony. Don't know why I keep going back. I love him but it seems like things are going nowhere. What's a girl to do? I talked to some psychics and one said that I need to let this go in order to bring in something good for the future. She said that a storybook romance is in my future. Who knows? Psychics are sometimes sketchy in fact you can completely trust in them. I was bored and rolling off x so.... we'll see what happens. I really want to find love and settle down.

Hi again,

Well today i'm on my period I feel shitty and crappy and edgy. I feel better than I did before spiritually and self esteem wise. Im not talking to hector because he pissed me off. I asked him yesterday where do we stand and he told me he only wanted me as a friend. So I asked him so there is no chance of us ever getting back together again and he says there could be you never know what the future holds for us. That to me is wishy washy. Plus it hurt me and I don't want to go back to that dark, insecure place again where I'm getting desperate and having nightmares. I won't do it. So I stopped talking to him. Today he sent me a text saying hes sorry and he wants to be friends. Im not sure but I didn't respond. Im tired of being hurt. he knows I love him and want to be in a relationship again. I mean I know you can't make someone be with you but it seems he wants the relationship too but is scared of what, I dont know. well im at school now finishing homework. I am so not in the mood as my emotions are fucked. Well Happy Valentines all.